Kids

Why do people want kids? My husband wants kids because he thinks they all grow up like weeds, fast and low maintenance. I don't want kids because I think they are like those delicate flowers that need the perfect balance of sunshine and water.I love my daughter dearly. There is nothing in this world that can replace the love I have for her. But because of this love, I feel so trapped, always so concerned about her well being. In my mind, I know I have to let go, but I'm worried about every aspect of her life. Her school, her friends, her health, her happiness, sadness, future boyfriends, future husband, careers, children etc. My husband doesn't worry about her. He believes that she'll grow up according to her natural disposition.

Sometimes, I think, I should have two kids instead of one. Maybe, having one child makes me too focused on her. If I have two, I'd have a more relaxed attitude towards parenting. Sure, two kids would totally suck up my time and energy to the point that I have to let go. I look at babies occasionally, and how much I yearn to kiss those cheeks. Too bad, I don't think I can have a baby anymore!